Build-A-Cope
Warrior Copium Automation
Warrior Excuse Generator
For when a 350 loses to a Blaster and the rider suddenly becomes a carburetor scientist, traction expert, clutch analyst, and constitutional lawyer at the same time.
Preset Excuse Packs
For common Warrior emergencies
Click one when the Warrior owner is too emotionally damaged to form a complete sentence.
The Carb Wizard
“It was lean, rich, cold, hot, humid, dry, and somehow all at once.”
The Clutch Defense
“It only started slipping after the Blaster got ahead, which is legally suspicious.”
The Surface Expert
“Wrong dirt. Wrong dust. Wrong moon phase. Perfect machine though.”
The Future Build
“Wait until the parts arrive. The same parts that have been arriving since Obama was president.”
The Video Denial
“The angle makes it look like I lost. The finish line was emotionally biased.”
The CC Lawsuit
“A 200 should not beat a 350, therefore the race violated math.”
Need paperwork too?
File a Butt Hurt Report
When the generated excuse is not enough, send the rider to the official fake complaint form.